Von Trier proves he's still a master of inauthenticity. But at least he puts the art in artificial. Or was it the other way around? For anyone who love oversized, bloated allegories and long-winded unbelievable stories told by people (characters or actors, I'm not sure, but what's the difference) who don't for one second believe them, then this is the film for you. Everybody else should stay away, including those who enjoy pornography. No, wait, especially those who enjoy pornography, because the sex in Nymphomaniac is just about as unsexy as it comes. That may of course have been Von Trier's point, but I've long since stopped caring about that.